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Stephanie Dowling

This Darkness Belongs to You

Updated: Aug 6, 2022

Breathwork opened some door - some hole in the floor - some eye in the sky, that could see me - and it chose me - to no longer be ridden by the madness - but to ride It.

It looked - felt - smelled - like R-A-G-E.


It consumed me - until I became it - some wild, open throated beast - roaring from the center - veins popping - eyes bulging out of my head.

It took hold of my limbs - fists clenched - claws sprawled and wide - wanting - needing to rip and tear - until I collapsed - into a weeping pile of weakness and wanting - “Mommy.”

Whimpering for relief - no understanding - a warm wash of tears - into the darkness - music blasting - help me with knowing.


Please. What is happening?


And then there was this: "Ride".

Ride the dark horse. Ride.

With grace and pride, ride.


It's been different each time - the hollows - the moonlight, stabbing through the leaves - ducking under branches - eating the shadows between the trees.


Yet, this is what you asked for - this is yours to do.


Take it. Transform it.

This darkness belongs to you.

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